Disappointment

Its never fun to be disappointed.  I wish I could take all disappoinment away from children, especially after this year.  I sometimes want to say, "They've had enough disappointment, can something go their way for once?"  Okay, I've said it.  I was honest.  That is how I feel.  I wish it could all be roses.

I've probably posted this before.  But, here are these little perserverers (word?).  Parker, Brady, Madilyn.

But having said that, and having "this year", I understand a lot more about diappoinment and how it can help us learn.  It doesn't mean I like the disappointment any better, but it does mean I think I understand a little more how it can help my children grow and know early on life isn't all roses. 

My children have been so resilient.  They have perservered like I didn't know any kids could.  I know children are adaptable, but as I have watched Madilyn and Parker, I have simply been amazed.  They take their moments to cry, but they also don't hesitate to bring up an Ethan memory.  Their memories are my favorites to hear.  They really have had a huge disappointment, but know they're going to be okay.

They have also been awesome about grief counseling.  They love New Song Center for grieving children (through Hospice of the Valley).  They realized after attending they are "not the only ones" who have lost a loved one.  Parker had expressed in the beginning that his dad was the only other person he knew who had lost a brother.  This was comforting to Parker, but hard for him to go to church and school and feel like the ONLY person who had this happen.  He felt no one could relate.  He now knows differently and knows that other kids his own age have experienced similar losses.  Madilyn has a great time doing the activities every other week that get to remind her of Ethan.  We got to light a candle last week and blow it out at the end of the meeting because it was Ethan's anniversary.  The kids enjoyed having that privilege.

Parts of a hymn I wanted to share as I have contemplated this 'disappointment" we have in life:

Be still, my soul:  The Lord is on thy side.
With patience bear thy cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In ev'ry change he faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul:  Thy best, they heav'nly Friend
Thru thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul:  The hour is hast'ning on
We we shall be forever with the Lord,
When DISAPPOINTMENT, GRIEF and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul:  When change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

I know I need to leave things up to the Lord.  I know there will be a joyful end.   But, when my kids are involved right now it is hard to do that.  Its hard to see their disappointment in things and not want to make it ALL better.  I do want to make it as 'rosy' as possible for them, but I want them to be strong individuals too.  How to balance it all?