Things I Really Appreciate

This weekend with cousins

(L to R: Jaycee, Jurnee, Madilyn, Shea)

After Ethan died, I realized which things are important and which are not with more clarity than I ever have.  My love of reality shows is nowhere near where it used to be.  Strange?  No.  I think I just didn't have my head fully pointed to where it should be.  I realize family is the most important and will do anything to just have family time, which we all know gets harder as our days are filled with so much.

However,  I wanted to share what things I LOVE having of Ethan's.  This had made it easier to know what to save and what to do with my other kids.  I LOVE having videos!  It makes him seem alive.  It is so different from a still photo. So, take videos of your kids.  You'll appreciate them even more than a picture (at least I do).  But, when it comes to pictures, I LOVE the ones I have with me and Ethan together--just the two of us.  I also LOVE it when its a picture with him and JUST one sibling or parent.  Its just soo cute when you can see the two of them together.  I don't have enough of these.  I also don't think you can have enough of any picture when you lose a child.  So, take pictures.  I LOVE the handprints and footprints I have.  I LOVE seeing anything in his writing.  Old math assignments aren't nearly as exciting and fun as reading an old writing assignment like the "Dear Santa" letter that was on his funeral program.   I LOVE the cheesy mother's day things I have to look at and the little letters he wrote me.  I will forever save the ones my kids make from here on out.  I LOVE his artwork (I still did pick and choose between these).  I LOVE his voice.  I have videos on my phone he made the week before he went in the hospital and you can really only hear him and not see him. I LOVE listening to those.  And I absolutely LOVE talking about him.  So, don't hesitate to ever bring him up. I love, love, love the opportunity to remember him and to know others still think about him.  (Below is a video to be appreciated. Notice how Ethan treats Madilyn ..classic)

I added the rest of our weekend on here.  I did this because I love family and getting together with them. I appreciate everything they have done for us, so it can fall under the title "Things I Really Appreciate".

(top pic: L to R:  Cooper, Parker, Kaden, Hailey and Kayci)

(bottom pic:  Madilyn dancing(??) with Kaden--notice all the red cups :))

This past weekend we went to Grandma and Grandpa Ellsworths for Thanksgiving.  Ethan loved that place--and Madilyn and Parker beg to go there too.  I tried to take pictures this weekend (unlike I used to) and especially ones with Grandma and Grandpa in them.  I realized while trying to find pictures of Grandma and Grandpa that we didn't have any!  Again, I wanted pictures of my kids with their Grandparents.  And, as my memory works, I think I only got one of Brady and Grandpa.  However, because of these LOVES, I tried :)

(Brady was all smiles until we took a picture)

I did get to make sure Ethan's headstone was placed and was excited to see that it was.  Marcus and I took some time to cry and remember our little guy as we read his headstone, which reads "Our little patriot", which does sound very patriotric. However it doesn't have anything to do with the love of our country, but it does have everything to do with the love of football!  We certainly miss him!
As we spent our weekend with family, I don't think we even saw Madilyn or Parker for a couple of days.  They played and played and played with their cousins.  Marcus and I felt like we were the parents of one.  Little Brady had lots of attention!  Our cousins loved Brady too because he is such a happy, calm little thing.
I love my family and the family I married into! 
Look at my adorable in-laws:

The lighting was terrible.  Grandma Ellsworth had fallen and fractured her knee cap, so we got serve her for once!  It was fun.  My in-laws have taught my husband how to love like no other person I know, and I am forever grateful to them for that.

Marcus designed a game and his family enjoyed playing it (I think).  It took hours and he is still editing rules, etc.  He says its been stuck in his head for years and he had to get it out.  I'm not a creative brain so I don't know what that feels like.

I am so grateful for this time of year.  We miss Ethan so much, but we are very happy to have Brady here and Madilyn and Parker!  We are a lucky family!