Not Missing Moments

As I start my day, I am reminded of how much I need to be with my kids.  I can't believe how time flies.  I think we all say this when our kids are growing.  Eleven years with Parker seems like just a couple of years, yet here he is-being eleven.  Not really fair.  I want him to grow up so I get to see how he grows, yet I want him to never grow up because I love having him little. I don't want to miss any moments.  But, regardless of what I do, I will miss moments.  I wish I could document them all.

Then there is Madilyn.  She's a strong personality. I am not sure where that comes from???  I'm going to go ahead and blame that on the grandparents.  I sometimes don't know how to get her to do things she doesn't want to do.  She simply doesn't do them. Its a constant struggle.  I have mentioned before how much harder it is to discipline my kids after Ethan died, but I still do.  I think I am just not as good at it.  Time is going by with her too.  She is seven this December.

And, Brady brings up the rear.  He will be nothing but a strong personality too.  I can see it already.  He screams if he doesn't get what he wants. He's only one and throws himself on the ground if things don't go his way. Really?  How many years do I have of this? However, here's where I struggle.  I don't really want them to pass...but then I do.  I have a hard time with the throwing himself down and constantly re-directing.

But, each one is a blessing.  What I wouldn't give to have Ethan here throwing himself down because he didn't get his way.  What I wouldn't give to have their missing sibling here fighting with them and making it even more chaotic around here.  And, what I wouldn't give to have one more strong personality in the mix.  I miss our Ethan in every way possible.  Time really flew with him.  Seven years is not long....